keep dreaming♥

Tuesday, October 30, 2007 { 11:43 AM }

Kinda bored n freaking cold in class...damn it is like raining very heavily rite now...
rite now just thinking of some stuff that came to my mind...

PLAYERZ....
do you think they change for the better?
i mean like guys who call themselves Players..play around with girls...
i dont know and i dont want to judge others...
but to my opinion..these Players totally suck big time...playing around with lots of girls' feeling and breaking their lil' hearts wif their actions n words...
take these example...not that im pointing fingers at anyone...
wat if ur boyfren used to be those one of the so-called Players?
would u trust him even though he use to treat girls like dirt or so call their Toys?
would u love him for who he is even though u knew he use to sleep around..?
hmmmm...i wonder...
For me if my bf used to fall in that catergory, i would give him a chance...
u love that somebody for who they are and not wat they did in the past...accepting their past..and they are willing to change for the better...one chance only...
if he still wanna play around then adios amigo!

then take another example...
wat if u fall in love wif a guy but after some time u found out that he's a player...?
would u still go out wif him and call him?eventhough like u guys had tonnes of fun at every outing...
i dont know ah...coz i got a fren who is in love wif a player..but she doesnt kow it...
well..i also used to date a Player...no regrets on that
wat is their purpose???
i wonder...

Monday, October 29, 2007 { 10:48 AM }

lack of beauty sleep...
ma body arching all over...
brain not functioning well enough..
haiz!! (>_<)

I'm still waiting for his call...
I'm still waiting to meet up wif him...
should i be angry at him for not calling me before going overseas...
i don't know...
the feeling is totally mixed up...

arrrrggghhh!!!
I'm working later...yesterday skip work...got a really bad headache..
damn it! i got no life...my life is go to skul followed by work after that...the same routine every damn day...
friday...was official off day for skul..
yahoo!!!
but still got to work at Coffee Club...i'm working wif Khalid...closing that nite...
seriously speaking its capital B-oring!!
operation wise it was straight-forward...but the people wasn't that fun as the peeps at McCafe..

well on Saturday nite..i did closing wif azri,hakim, khai & roz at cafe...
havoc like hell seh...it was Halloween nite...the 3 buggers were like singing n dancing their hearts out..they had fun for sure..and so did us..me n roz...we were laughing our guts out capturing their dancing act....well u guys know how to have fun...
i always had fun working with the 3 of them...everytime is a different mischieve...
crazy shit!! i'll upload the video soon..when i got the time...
got to chao now!!

baby...im still waiting for that phone call from u..

Wednesday, October 24, 2007 { 1:11 PM }

cant decide on whether to work at coffee club or not?
really shuxz!well..though the pay isn't that much but i enjoy working there...
haiz!!!
next few weeks..will be like buzy...buzy bee..with the filming stuff,script writing,finding of actor n actress..not forgetting working...im damn tired..last nite work till closing..came back at around 230am...slept at 3pluz...
tired to call that someone but he was asleep..didn't received any calls or msgs from him...
shagged to the max..arrrrgggggghhh!!
working like everyday seh..no life B****!!

freak seh...!!! when is all these stupid misery gonna end...???when will i that lil' happiness that i dying to have..???wif my so-call "ghost" boyfren who is having a f***ing hard time managing time for me..and wif my frens...
i do have fun wif the peeps at skul..but where's the ultimate fun in life...?sickening ah...i have to work to freaking kill time can...but when i have all the time to spare,no one is there to spend it wif me....cibaikaninextnabui.....
sori im like cursing too much today...coz im sibei pissed off...!!!
its totally unfair..other people can find time to spare, to enjoy and have fun...
but not me...
f*** life!
i dont give a freaking damn anymore...!

Tuesday, October 23, 2007 { 11:18 AM }

These semester is gonna b a rough one.gonna start on filming soon.at the same time doing flash animation.freak seh! but the cool thing is,i got only 4 days of skul..friday got no classes...yahoooo!
Stuff been rough diz few days..its not that i want to complaint abt it but its just rough.
i got the flu attack again..its juz damn irritating..hate being sick..got work like everyday..dont wanna be a nag but im the one who wants to do it..
if i dont work,i'll be having too much free time but i cant spend my time wif bf coz he's working his ass off...shucks!!!
so might as well i work..im starting work soon at coffee club too..but im working with Khalid...no way in hell im working in the same outlet as my bf...also got another offer from Amiran's Cafe..but i have to put it on hold..
im gonna miss working at mc,those crazy people..the crazie times we had..the stupid jokes..haiz!gonna miz them...
besides everything else im juz bored wif everything...there's like no fun..same schedule every damn day...hmmmmm...shit seh...
gonna work on the film script soon...its like due nxt week...

Saturday, October 06, 2007 { 3:30 PM }

Rite now..i feel really lost..not sure if watever im doing is right or wrong...puzzled abt everything..i feel so useless and hopeless..
i have someone who i call boyfren but he's like not there...i have no idea who the one changing..me or him...is it wrong for me to kill time wif my fren,have fun rather than feel sad that i have no one to talk wif..during my free time when he's at work...?i wonder...i feel sad deep down inside seeing others go out happily spending time wif their loveones...
coz i know deep down,he is working hard to support himself n for his future...who am i to disagree to whatever he's doing is..im nobody...not his wife...im invisible...
im just plain lost...

i hate my life...my house is more like hell rather than home sweet home...
im not a superwomen who can save the world..
im not catwomen who is independent..
i am myself..a girl who is longing for a lil attention n love from someone who she call darling,her baby,her love and life..who is dependent on him..
is it wrong to just crave for attention?
at times i wonder if the love i gave him is enough...